Christmas 2012

Our boy's first Christmas, and it was the best one yet!

We had church in the morning, morning tea with my family, lunch was just the three of us at home and dinner was back at my parents.

Christmas took on a whole new meaning for me this year having our own little baby boy. The fact the the Creator would come down to us in the form of a completely helpless infant, entirely dependant on His own creation, has just been blowing my mind this week.

Carols in the Hills

Hugo's first Christmas carols at church, Sunday the 16th!

4th Anniversary

I love this man.

And three days ago we celebrated four years of marriage.

The 13th may have come and gone without much fanfare this year (we have been a little busy with other things - named Hugo!), no special dinner date, no little getaway and we haven't even exchanged gifts, but it is no less special than any of the years past.

In fact I think it might even be better.

Each year I am married to this man I fall more in love with him, and watching him become a daddy has magnified that love even more.

I am blessed beyond words to have this man in my life, to get to do life with him, to call him my best friend and husband.

Happy 4th wedding anniversary Dave.

I love you!

Learning

This whole parenting thing is such a big change in a persons life, and even though the start we have had really couldn't have been better, there are some challenges and adjustments that have to be made, and lots of learning to be done.

Hugo has really had no trouble with feeding and has been a pretty good sleeper so far. Except for in the evenings up until about 10pm. It's been a challenge to figure out what is causing his disturbance at this time. Is he hungry? is he over tired, does he have wind/gas?

If he's over tired how do I make him sleep more during the day? Some days he just won't sleep in the afternoon. No amount of rocking, cuddling, jiggling, walking will make any difference. All part of learning him and his rhythms.

The idea of leaving the house just for a short while is quite a ridiculous one when you think about all the stuff you have to take, and all that stuff is for ONE TINY baby! Even a small trip requires half an hour of planning beforehand. I just get Dave to stop at the supermarket for me on his way home from work!

Today was the first time I have read a book since Hugo was born. I really had no idea how all consuming this tiny little love would be. Even when he's sleeping, getting through a task is broken up, simply because I check on him every 10 minutes. Simple things take twice as long as they used too.

At first I was really anxious about going out with Hugo, even with Dave coming along too. I was so worried about getting to the middle to Target and having him start crying, and by the time we could get back to the car to feed or change him, he would be hysterical. (this did actually happen on Monday, the poor little thing was so upset by the time I could get to the car to feed him. It was my most horrible parenting moment yet) I was also a little worried about dropping him when getting him in and out of his car seat. Silly I know, but still...

I'm still a little nervous when I go out with him, but I have no problem feeding him in the car, and I always have a plan of where I can feed him when I'm out and about.

I have no doubt that for the rest of my life I will be continually learning this parenting thing, and poor Hugo will forever be the one we try things out on. I just pray that when he is old enough he will know that we have done our best for him. We will make plenty of mistakes, and that breaks my heart to think about, but we will always have his best interest at heart.

One Month

Our boy Hugo has been in our arms for one month as of yesterday.

I can't believe how fast this month has passed by, yet it also feels like we have always had him with us.

I've always known that I wanted to be a mother, but I had no idea of the pure joy that our boy would bring into our lives.

He makes us laugh, hurts our hearts in the best possible way, makes me cry when I think of the incredible, undeserved blessing that he is, and can make me waste away hours simply staring at him, drinking his cuteness.

Hugo becomes more alert each day, and while I love the softness of him, the way he moulds into my arms, and the beauty of this newborn stage, I am looking forward to when he starts to interact more with us, when he smiles in response to us and can hold eye contact for longer periods of time. 

We love you Hugo, our little man!

Wonder

Wonder is...

my heart hurting in the best possible way when I look at my little boy

watching Dave become "daddy"

Hugo's tiny nose in profile

also his tiny fingers and toes, the way he purses his lips and all the funny little faces he makes

catching one of his lopsided smiles on camera

staring at him while he feeds, and knowing that he is perfectly content while he is nursing

how completely I have fallen in love with him and being his mummy

know that just a month ago he was still in my womb, and what an incredible miracle conception, birth and life is

that I would be so blessed in this life, and given the gift of my husband and baby

knowing that God sent His Son to earth in the form of a tiny baby like Hugo, and that He made the ultimate sacrifice for me.

Wonder is experiencing Christmas (and life) with a new perspective this year.

My Purpose

I have always struggled with knowing my purpose, with knowing what it it I'm supposed to be doing with my life, what God wants me to be doing. In the past I have felt like I have wasted days and frittered them away doing meaningless things.

I can honestly say that while these last three weeks have flown by in a whirlwind of feeding, nappies and sleep, not once have I felt purposeless. Not once have I felt like days were passing and lie was passing me by.

Never has my life been richer, nor my purpose more clear than since I became "mummy."

Things I have Been Surprised By

Things I have been surprised by since we Hugo arrived...

That his poo doesn't completely gross me out. And that I actually tried to catch it one day to stop it from going all over the change mat (you know you're a mother when you do that!)

How confident Dave has been with holding him, changing nappies, dressing him, putting him in his car seat, and just in general. I knew he would be a great dad, but his instant confidence in the role took me by surprise.

How completely in love with Hugo I am.

How completely all consuming caring for him has been these first couple of weeks.

How protective of him I am, and how cautiously I want to be in introducing him to the wider world around him.

That having him has made me love Dave even more. Having and loving our son has increased the love I have for his father.

How much praying I have been doing. I don't think I have ever prayed as much as I have over the last couple of weeks. Prayer has become almost constant, and they seem to be much deeper emotionally for me as I pray for Hugo.

That I seem to have forgotten what life was like before him.

That co-sleeping feels completely right for our family.

That I want to have another baby as soon as possible.

That it really is true that you forget the pain of childbirth. It takes a few days, but that memory really does pass.

Life Lately

The days seem to roll together and the last two weeks are a blur, no one day standing out from the rest. We have relished the time together, the three of us all at home, learning about this new life we have created, a family.

We are learning more and more about our little son. We are learning what his different noises mean and how best to respond to them.

He has begun to have some longer periods of time where he is awake, and his eyes are starting to focus much better. We love staring into the deep blue of them, talking to him, kissing him, reading with him.

Dave is back at work this week, and we are very blessed that my Mum has been able to take some time off and will come and spend some days with Hugo and I. While we will miss Daddy we are so thankful for his job and for how hard he works to provide for us.

One Week

(I wrote this when he was eight days old, but I have had computer issues and so am now only getting the chance to put up on the blog.)

Hugo, you were one week old yesterday and already mama is a little concerned about how quickly the days are going.

These first days with you have been a blur, a mix of sleeping, eating, nappy changes and staring at you.

Hours can disappear as we drink in you, your scent, your tiny features and all the little noises you make.

My hormones kicked in at about day five and I get all teary at the drop of a hat. It's yet to be over anything bad, simply because I'm aware of how blessed I am and how undeserving of it all I am.

That God would entrust you to us astounds me. You are precious beyond words. Your daddy and I can't imagine life without you, and we both seem to have forgotten what life was like before you.

Our love for you has only increased our love for each other and I cannot imagine a more incredible man for you to call "daddy." He has astounded me with his confidence as a parent and seeing the two of you together takes my breath away.

We love you little Hugo and are cherishing these early days at home together, the three of us, knowing that soon daddy will be back at work, and you will keep growing, faster that we can keep up with.

Introducing....

Hugo David Timberlake

Born 2nd November 2012 at 11:01am

Weight: 3.46kg/7.6lbs. Length 51cm

 

We are in LOVE!!!

October Books

"The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe" - C.S. Lewis
"Prince Caspian" - C.S. Lewis
"The Voyage of the Dawn Treader" - C.S. Lewis
"Grace Based Parenting" - Dr Tim Kimmel
"In the Grip of Grace" - Max Lucado

October Links

How to Live a First Hand Kind of Life - Incourage

Ramblings and Confessions of a Jesus Lover Wrestling with Social Media and the Ways We Idolise - Livesay Haiti

What I'm Learning These Days - A Bigger Story

Haiti, Personal Crisis and a Manifesto  - Jen Hatmaker

Boys and Birthdays - Going Beyond

31 Days to Write Your Story - Lisa-Jo Baker

For the Days When Your Blog or Your Life Feel Small - Lisa-Jo Baker

Why the Battle for Joy is Really Worth It - A Holy Experience

Stephanie's Words on Influence - Naptime Diaries

Fishers of Men

I just wanted to share this video that I came across today.

Flaws

(I have no idea where I found this. Silly me didn't save the link. If anyone knows. please let me know so I can give credit where credit is due)

Isn't it nice to know that even the old hero's of the faith were as flawed as we are. I sure think it is.

Way too often I put people up on a pedestal; people from the Bible, wise authors from centuries past, writers and speakers around today.

I too often compare myself and my flaws with their gifts and their words and their actions, and forget they they too were, and are, human.

Thank goodness God sees past our faults and failings and sees the potential that lies underneath. He casts vision for us with eyes of grace and knows what we can be and do for Him, despite our flaws.


linking up here

38 Weeks!

 

Baby size: baby is almost 49.8cm long and weighing around 3kgs!

How far along: 38 weeks and 1 day! So close!!

Maternity clothes: Still not wearing any maternity stuff, but the jeans only go on now for church. It's yoga pants the rest of the time!

Food cravings: I have finally had some cravings - cakes and donuts.

Food aversions: Still minced beef and cooked vegetables. I tried to eat a hamburger patty on Monday night. The first bite was spat out into the rubbish bin!

Symptoms: I have had what I think are braxton hicks contractions, just times when the belly tightens for a few seconds. Some days it happens a few times, other days not at all.

Midwifes appointment: We have an appointment on Tuesday where Kerry will come out to our house, so I don't have to get dressed and go anywhere!

Movement: Baby has started to slow down a little, running out of room in there I think! When it does move they are quite big movements, or I'm getting little feet or knees jabbing me under my ribs on my right hand side. Sometimes baby must be having a good stretch because it can feel like I have a foot poking my ribs for up to an hour at a time.

Gender: Can't wait to find out!

Best moment of the week: Feeling like we have all the practical stuff ready. I know there is only so much we can do emotionally to prepare, but all the other things seem to be ready.

What I miss: Hugging Dave without a basketball in the way! It will be nice to hug again without the bump there!

What I'm looking forward to: Meeting our little one!! Come soon bubba!

Garage Sale

We had a garage sale on the weekend at my parents place, and while I was happy with the bit of cash we made there was one thing about it that really bothered me.

Early on in the day, once everything was set up I stood out in the driveway and looked back at all the tables.

They were so crammed full of stuff. Stuff that we no longer use (some of which we never used), don't like, is out of fashion or we simply have no need for.

The sight of it made me a little sick, especially knowing that we still have cupboards full of clothing, shoes, homewares, books and a garage full of Dave's stuff too.

Really, how much junk can two people have accumulated in less than four years of marriage? Apparently a lot. And we often think we need more!

Are we nuts?!

Looking at those tables piled high with what we considered junk gave me some much needed perspective.

It is way to easy to get caught up in the consumerism that exists all around us, while turning a blind eye to the fact that there is incredible need in our world. It's not easy to find the balance between living in the society that we live in without conforming to it, and holding our hands out to those less fortunate.

I know that I can make do with a lot less than I think I can, and truthfully, there would be a lot of things that I could get rid of still, and I know that I wouldn't miss it once it was gone. I hope that from now on I'll think twice before buying something I "need" for around the house.

Need vs want, people. Need vs want.

In the Womb

Last Thursday night our church had an evening for the pregnant women called "In the Womb." It's something they do every now and again throughout the year.

I will admit that I wasn't thrilled to attend. Groups of women freak me out. (those are issues for another day)

I am so glad that I did.

It was a wonderful night of sharing, listening, chatting and praying with other mum-to-be's and older mums within our church family.

The evening also made me realise that I should really say yes to women's events more often. Sometimes being outside my comfort zone turns out to not be a bad thing, but can in fact be an incredible blessing.

Baby Shower

Taking ideas from this baby shower, baby Timberlake was celebrated with a baby "shower" on Saturday. Gumboot and umberella cupcakes were made by my lovely friend Yvonne. That girl is crazy with what she can do with a little fondant.

I would put up a few photos of me opening gifts, but I look HUGE in every single of them and I am that vain that I'm not going to put them up on here!!

Not long now until baby will be in our arms. We reached full term today - 37 weeks. Come on baby, we're ready to meet you!!

36 weeks

 

Baby size: Baby is about 47cm long and weighing about 2.6kg. No wonder my belly is really starting to feel heavy!

 

How far along: 36 weeks and 1 day

 

Maternity clothes: I still haven't purchased any maternity clothes, although I am starting to think I should have gotten some maternity jeans. Mine are starting to be really tight. I only wear them if I'm going out in public otherwise it's yoga pants all the way!

 

Food cravings: Still nothing I would consider a craving.

 

Food aversions: Still red meat and cooked vegetables, although I have had a little red meat here and there since my birthday.

 

Symptoms: Just horrible sleep. Thank-goodness I'm not working and can fit in a nap in the afternoon. I also got a couple of stretch marks last week (boo!!!), but only having two so far isn't too bad I guess.

 

Midwife's appointment: Tomorrow, with our backup midwife. It should be really good to talk with her about our wishes for the birth and get to know her a little, just in case!

 

Movement: Baby is really active some days, and fairly quiet others. I had a foot or knee permanently under my right ribs for about 4 days straight, thank-goodness baby has moved on from that position! There are also a lot less little movements happening in there. When baby does move, it's a big movement and tends to cause my stomach to have weird lumps appear all over, as it's little limbs re-adjust!  

 

Gender: Looking forward to finding out. I have got absolutely no thoughts on whether it's a boy or a girl. At lease we now have a name picked out for a girl too, so if the baby was born today and was a girl it would no longer be nameless!!

 

Best moment of the week: Getting the bassinet set up.

 

What I miss: Sleep!

 

What I'm looking forward to: My baby shower on the weekend.

Bassinet

We picked up the bassinet on Saturday and it has been set up in our bedroom ever since. I love seeing it every time I walk in. There is just one thing missing from it....!

Lately: Getting Ready for Baby

Much of my day to day activity lately has been about getting ready for the baby's arrival. More loads of washing than I care to count (how cute are the nappies and the tiny little onesies?!!!), making baby shower invites (following printer issues at Lydia's house!!), cooking up about 7 freezer meals, putting the car seat in the car (then needing Dave's older brother, who has three kids, to re-fit it for us because it was moving all over the place back there) and starting several sewing projects for the baby's room (and completing none of them as yet!).

The dining table is a disaster, as is the pile of stuff next to it for the garage sale we were going to have this Saturday, but have had to put back for two more weeks. The baby's room is getting closer to being ready for the little one. I still need to do some stocking up on essential items for both the baby and the house, but will wait until after the baby shower to make any last minute purchases. Once that is done, I'll be able to pack our hospital bags and then hopefully put my feet up for a week or so before we are no longer a pair, but a threesome!!